Como Estan, Bitches;

Ohhhhhh, Anchorman! What a delightful film you are.

So, I've decied to actually try and be a human being this year; rather, I'm attempting to fill out my human profile. I want to be more of an actual productive being than just a stagnant human. I'm not sure why I decided this, though it could have been a couple things, I feel it's more an action of convienence than anything. New years and resolutions and all that such and flounce.

A couple of those things I'll be documenting here, on my semi-abandoned blog; so this is a post of introduction.
I want to:

- send a '' invitation code, is a fashion community. At times it's a little biased towards pretty pictures (as opposed to actual clothes coordination), but I visit there quite frequently and 'hype' the newest looks. Now, I'm not a part of the community yet (that's the first part of the goal), but one of my general goals is to start dressing better so I decided this would be a neat way to do so. You can send your blog in and be sent a code from the site or receive one from a member, but I'm going for the former. Fashion blogs are about half the Internet nowadays anyway, and it's not a terrible bandwagon. I mean, it'll be another month or two before the mass suicides begin, right?
- Cosplay at a convention
Kitsurubamiiiii this year most certainly! And maybe some gijinka?
- Participate in NaNoWriMo
- Learn 4 K-Dances

These are only a few, but I'm sure many others will pop up if I keep this blog as I intend to. I may update later, if I dress for the day with an image or two :p

But weekdays in your 'indecents' are so great.

Also, WhoHoo! I made my ljblog pretty :D

Hello old friend(s).

What's your favorite thing to order for takeout?
Chinese. Getting a piss load and sharing. It's friendly and delicious. : )


So ponder the word  wonderful for a moment. Ignoring etymology and all that flounce for just a moment (we might come back to it). When said (in my silly plain American accent, at least) it is sort of 'wonderful'. The flat 'one' in the beginning is sort of extended into a vertical rise till it meets the 'durr', which would serve as the peak of our roller-coaster metaphor, and then in the end the descent is graceful; and the whole word ends in an open breath, like coming to a rolling stop (which does not a stop make ;D ).

It's really nice in that sense, it's disturbing when words don't fit their sounds or meanings. Take 'puce' for example. Because of my particular mentality, 'puce' has a similar structure as 'puke' and so it is at first understood to be something negative. If you don't know what puce is, it's a color.

Now, knowing that, and that it reminds one of 'puke', one would probably figure it to be some grotesque variation of green found in dead nature scenes and compost heaps, but in truth: it's actually a very lovely rosey sort of purple shade that I think looks particularly pleasing in stained glass concepts.

check it out some more here

I talk about singular words a lot. One of my favorites is grotesque simply because it is just so very morbidly wonderful  :3
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I'm going to start using this journal. :/

Just not right now.
This is a warning to those on my friends list, that some of my posts might begin to pop up!

Do not be frightened : D

Let's make one for misfortune.

So I'm very much not pleased with my kind nature.

I want to yell at a few people, three I think, in particular, but I can't find the voice to do so. I never say everthing I want to say, because I'm much too concerned for the welfare of anyone I speak to. Which is probably why I like to be alone so often. I can't much think straight now, so the nature of this post is written so haphazardly.

I read a Capote story, so sue me.

I'm one of those people who take out emotions through things. Like singing, or thinking, or staring, or running. Those are the main ones. I'm upset with the people in my class. I'm upset that they seem to be so different from myself, because I very naturally feel that people should give things if they ever want to see a good day. It's stupid, but I blame myself for anything that I slightly have anything to do with that goes just a tick arwy. I don't cry much, and that's probably why I twitch, because of the anxiety. Being around people too much makes my chest heavy, especially when they are irrisponsible or do foolish things even when I try to think bad things about them to make myself not care.

I'm sure someone would say that it is bad to blame yourself, but I don't think I could live such a good life if I didn't. It's my stupid way of pretending I'm making things fair. I'm normally very happy, so I can't be, or something? I just don't want to lose that.

A couple taps to defend mistakes keeps me from falling into trouble. And I think I'm upset, because that's not working any more, and I still tap, and do whatever I'm 'supposed' to because I think that'll make things work out better for other people. (It's still working. I'm sure of it, most of the time. It's incredible. I must be a witch, or a something.) The twitching, I think, is the reprocussion for not doing what I'm 'supposed' to. It's like my super-ego is pinching my spine. It's stupid and silly. But I couldn't say this outloud without something lame happening, so I think I'll print this out to the shrink, or to Frued upon his second comming.

I want to be a superhero. They always have cool stories.

See, I'm not even upset anymore >w<
Thanks Utada! Your music's too poppy. lol

Oh! I finished my Blair-kitty,
She's so cute : D

it's me and a pink elephant at the center of oblivion

and I can't even see it's there.
I gave a sentance to my mind-people.

I really think I have some sort of neurological problem, and I often think of dying young, but even if I were diagnosed (with hypochondriousis ;p ) I don't think I'd take anything to correct the issue. I think I'm signed-up to go to the neruologist again sometime soon though. Last time we never went to the appointment ;-_-

Two weeks until mental freedom and then what? I don't like being not busy, but I can't stand not busying myself with my own projects. I need to be a designer of some sort, or a writer. Honestly, I'm too blase with the creativity sparks.

God Damn Gwen Steffani; I WANT TO GO TO JAPAN. I'd live in squalor just to be able to live saftely in a country of foreign tongue. Now I should be a linguist. Can I make a new job description, plz?

Starting three new sewing projects:
- Bustle Skirt
- Cutsew
- Little jacket thingy or Capelet 

I decided that I don't like people today. In general. They don't agree with my morals. Ain't that odd? Say I should go live in a Stick-up-My-Butt colony. I really hope I develop xcreme Antisocial Personality Dissorder. Then I can be a real nihilist. I'll kill off so many people I'd cause a nitemare. Gross. HEY POLICE! USE THIS TO PROSECUTE ME.   x)

It's a brand new day
So I'm amazed that I can use the blunt of my thumb to cover up the sun.

Gimme, gimme, gimme, some cold medicine.
o.chiii~ i love yuu
  • Current Mood
    pleased pleased no STAIRU


Hnn~ I wish I were a better artist. In art today this underclassman who sits in front of me kept complaining that my color wheel looked nicer than his. Of course, every other moment he complained about having to do art in - how scandalous - art class. Maybe he hates paint.

I like paint and painting. I kind of want to incorporrate it into my adult lifepath but I'm not sure yet. I also always fall back into the idea of some sort of anatomy/chemisty field, but really, they're only appriciated when something bad happens, and I like my sunny outlook. Could it be darkened?

I also want to sew more. So I will. And I'll draw more too. And I'll continue to paint in art class, but I probably won't paint much more (besides the occasional paint by numbers and the *master grade gundum).

Despite all of that, I'll need to write more, but my grades are doing quite fine without my concern. I think I'll try some more for colleges, but I'm still in a void. Not sure about much at the moment, or I'll be like little Krona: "I don't know how to deal with it." so I just go with my black blood, my Ragonarok or whatever the apethetic influence in my head will accept to go by in this little space of internet. I like this little space of internet. lol. I could make another Soul Eater reference, but the download's pretty much done now.

I have theories about myself, and I think they're true. But if I admit to those theories out loud, then I feel like I'd feel like someone making excuses for themself. Freud said in Discontents that we have a consciousness of guilt and in a very decorated way, also says that, that means that we have a need of punishment. Sometimes I feel that's so very true, and at some moments I don't think at all. So I wonder, if that punishment need is so normalized, then it could be considered a method of maintaing control of the ego, or just yourself I guess. I don't think it's all a bad thing at all, but I'm an optomist in most cases. 

Maybe I have a permenent fever? I hate when my mom touches my things.  

*This latter part here, that's a joke. D;
  • Current Mood
    anxious anxious
  • Tags

Sing songs in 'sing-song' then throw up, my cherie

I miss xanga. It was easier to make look nicer. I used to wrek that site, with my own layout page seperate from my own and everything. But those were simpler times, right? So let's dismiss them to the back of the head (which is truly a shame since the occipital lobe is really something neat, but I begin to ramble...)

Looking back on old fads, things have really changed though.

Lookie what I did, my old dates on my xanga:
Come now my lovely, play it again, that morose Sunday
Oh what fun, Look, Look! It's raining bloody Monday!
It's just so salacious, can't you smell the black Tuesday?
Please my dear, we're falling into an ill-fated Wednesday
Somber sites, no, let's go finding that lost Thursday
Geeze...fake smiles? It's been one cold Friday
It's raining and we're kissing goodbye on a grave Saturday

Just odd enough to make you want to waltz. Which may lead to other things both bad and good. But it's all relative ;D

I gots a lot of work to do, but I feel like a fever, so maybe I'll do it next week. Halloween is soon, and I'll need an outfit. Something neat hopefully, I have a few ideas. 

Thanks for friending me, person! 
  • Current Mood
    cold cold